我爱你: the words
| Character | Pinyin | Meaning |
|---|---|---|
| 我 ★ | wǒ | I |
| 爱 (愛) ★ | ài | love |
| 你 ★ | nǐ | you |
- Tones: third, fourth, third. Say it wǒ ài nǐ; there is no tone change here, because the two third tones are not next to each other.
- Traditional: 我愛你. The Traditional 愛 has 心 (heart) in the middle; the Simplified 爱 dropped it, which people like to point out.
- Stronger: 我很爱你 (wǒ hěn ài nǐ, I love you very much), 我好爱你 (wǒ hǎo ài nǐ, I love you so much), 我永远爱你 (wǒ yǒngyuǎn ài nǐ, I will love you forever).
我喜欢你: I like you
我喜欢你 (我喜歡你) wǒ xǐhuan nǐ means "I like you", and it is how most romantic confessions actually start. Telling someone 我喜欢你 before you are a couple is the normal way to say you have feelings for them; 我爱你 comes much later, if it is said at all.
| Chinese | Pinyin | When |
|---|---|---|
| 我喜欢你 | wǒ xǐhuan nǐ | Confessing a crush; early in a relationship |
| 我爱你 | wǒ ài nǐ | A serious, established relationship |
| 我想你 | wǒ xiǎng nǐ | I miss you: very common between couples, and warmer than it looks |
| 我想你了 | wǒ xiǎng nǐ le | I miss you (right now) |
喜欢 ★ also means "to like" for anything: 我喜欢茶 (I like tea). The context makes the romance clear.
Saying it to family and friends
In English, "I love you" is common between parents and children. In many Chinese families, especially older generations, it is not said out loud. Care shows up instead as questions and actions: 吃饭了吗？ (have you eaten?), 多穿点 (wear more layers), 早点休息 (get some rest).
That is changing. Younger people say 爱你 to parents in messages, sometimes on Mother’s Day or a birthday, and parents may reply in kind. With friends, 爱你 (without 我) or 爱你哦 is a light, affectionate thing to type, like "love ya".
- 妈妈，我爱你。 (Māma, wǒ ài nǐ.) Mom, I love you.
- 爱你！ Love you! (casual, in a message)
520 and other number codes
Chinese internet slang uses numbers that sound like phrases:
| Number | Said as | Sounds like | Meaning |
|---|---|---|---|
| 520 | wǔ èr líng | 我爱你 (wǒ ài nǐ) | I love you |
| 1314 | yī sān yī sì | 一生一世 (yìshēng yíshì) | For a lifetime |
| 5201314 | wǔ èr líng yī sān yī sì | 我爱你一生一世 | I love you for a lifetime |
Because of 520, May 20 is celebrated in mainland China as an unofficial day for couples, with gifts and confessions. Some couples send each other a WeChat red envelope of 520 yuan.
Terms of endearment
| Chinese | Pinyin | English |
|---|---|---|
| 宝贝 (寶貝) | bǎobèi | Baby, treasure |
| 亲爱的 (親愛的) | qīn’ài de | Dear, darling |
| 老公 | lǎogōng | Husband (also for a boyfriend, playfully) |
| 老婆 | lǎopo | Wife (also for a girlfriend, playfully) |
亲爱的 also opens messages and online shop chats ("dear customer"), so it is less intimate than it looks in text.
Example sentences
| Chinese | Pinyin | English |
|---|---|---|
| 我爱你，你知道吗？ | Wǒ ài nǐ, nǐ zhīdào ma? | I love you, you know that? |
| 我喜欢你很久了。 | Wǒ xǐhuan nǐ hěn jiǔ le. | I’ve liked you for a long time. |
| 你爱我吗？ | Nǐ ài wǒ ma? | Do you love me? |
| 我也爱你。 | Wǒ yě ài nǐ. | I love you too. |
| 我好想你。 | Wǒ hǎo xiǎng nǐ. | I miss you so much. |
| 我会一直爱你。 | Wǒ huì yìzhí ài nǐ. | I’ll always love you. |
How to reply
- 我爱你。 → 我也爱你。 (wǒ yě ài nǐ, I love you too)
- 我喜欢你。 → 我也喜欢你。 (I like you too), or, kindly: 谢谢你，但是…… (thank you, but…)
- 我想你了。 → 我也想你。 (I miss you too)
- 爱你！ → 爱你哦！ or a heart emoji
Common mistakes
- Saying 我爱你 too early. It carries more weight than "I love you" in English. On a first date, 我喜欢你 or 我很喜欢跟你在一起 (I really like being with you) fits better.
- Using 爱 for things you like. 我爱咖啡 (I love coffee) is fine for enthusiasm, but everyday "I like" is 喜欢.
- Misreading 我想你. 想 means both "to think" and "to miss". Said to a person, 我想你 is "I miss you", not "I think you".
- Expecting it back from older relatives. A parent who asks whether you have eaten, or packs you food, is often saying the same thing.